Dear Hyapatia,
My boyfriend wants to go home with me for the holidays. We’ve been together for several years and he thinks that I don’t want to take him home to my family because he embarrasses me. That’s not it at all. We both smoke weed and my parents are okay with it, but my grandma isn’t – and she lives with them now. I’d be in my old bedroom in the big farmhouse. I can’t stand the idea of having sex with my boyfriend there. It’s a small, rural community where everyone knows everyone else’s business and there is nowhere to go to get away to get high. I can deal with it for a few days, but I don’t want to put my boyfriend through that. If we could stay at a hotel or something, it would be different, but the closest hotel is over an hour away. Should I just skip going home this year? – Nichole
Dear Nichole,
There are several ways of dealing with this. You could take your boyfriend and go without sex for a while. Or you could face the facts. Even though you’ll be in your childhood bedroom, you’re not a child now. You have adult needs and desires. Consider going for walks to get away. Take a drive in the car to a more private area for fun. If you’re in a rural area, as you say, then you should be able to find privacy.
As far as your grandma’s acceptance of cannabis, she comes from an era when people were told all kinds of crazy lies by a government they felt they could trust. She’s older now and even though some propaganda is hard to overcome, many states have legalized consumption. Plus, there are thousands of reports and studies that confirm the safety of cannabis. If your grandma is still lucid, she could probably be easily educated. Start with Dr. Sanjay Gupta. But bear in mind that we cannot make up for lost time with loved ones, especially those who may not be with us much longer.
Dear Hyapatia,
I want to give my man a great Christmas, but money is really tight. I want to show him that I’m thinking of him, but I don’t want him to think that I just threw together some homemade thing. I want to incorporate pot and sex – and I want it to be special. Any ideas? – Denise
Dear Denise,
Think up a sexy scenario, like a romantic bubble bath for the two of you with wine, cheese, nice music and candles, followed by a warm oil massage and lovemaking. Write it all down on a card and put it in a box with a few blunts, along with the candles. Let your imagination run wild with role-playing ideas, sexy outfits, toys, and special things you can do for him that only you would know please him. Put each idea down on paper and wrap it up with some nice weed inside. I bet you’ll have a Christmas to remember!
Dear Hyapatia,
I can’t wait for next year. The holidays are so stressful. I try to do all the things I’m supposed to: buy the presents, wrap them, take the kids to see Santa, make the food – but I feel like I get no thanks for it. It’s all expected and I’m just not up to it this year. There isn’t enough pot in the world to get me through what I know is coming. Everyone is meeting at my house and there will be personality conflicts, political debates and lectures on how we should be living our life. I just want to stay in bed with my man and make love, smoke some weed and make love again. How can I make that happen? – Hunter
Dear Hunter,
I hear you! Often, the family we’re born into is not who we’d choose to hang out with and holidays are the worst for bringing this to light. When we add the stress of having to put on a big production like Christmas or Hanukkah, it increases the drama exponentially. One thing that can help you is to write down in a journal all of the things that push your buttons. When someone says something stupid and you can’t let it go, write it down when you’re alone. Then hide the journal. Once it’s been written down and you’ve acknowledged what’s annoyed you, tell yourself to forget about it. It will help free up your mind for other things, like happiness. Try to keep a sense of humor. Laugh at their stupidity and ignorance, rather than get frustrated by it. After all, you don’t have to live with their stupidity every day; they do! And ignorance is bliss. Get through it and try to keep a good attitude. Once it’s all over, you can spend the rest of the year making love to your man. But next year, I’d put your foot down. Let someone else take over the brunt of the work. Holidays are not meant for women to be working overtime!
Dear Hyapatia,
I started doing dabs about a year ago and that’s all I do now. My rig is my best friend – next to my girlfriend. When I smoke a joint or a blunt, it just isn’t the same. I’m not satisfied until I’m with my rig again. We’re going out of town for a few days for Christmas and I can’t take her with me – my rig, not my girlfriend. I know there are carrying cases and stuff that would make it easier to travel. I’ve put one on my Christmas list, but in the meantime, it looks like I’m going to be stuck smoking flowers. Here’s the problem: I’m not as good in bed when I’m not smoking wax. Do you think my girlfriend will be suspicious or mind if we didn’t have sex until I got back to my rig? – Jack
Dear Jack,
I think you may be better in bed than you think, even if you’re only smoking flowers. Often, when we have a great experience, we think it’s because of something we did prior to it that made it so special, especially if it happens several times. Our minds are our most powerful sex organ. If you believe it, then it must be so – a self-fulfilling prophecy. Don’t deny yourself simply because you feel you may not be as good under these circumstances. The holidays are stressful enough. We need all the help we can get in reducing that. Sex and weed are the best stress reducers I know!
Ask Hyapatia all of your questions regarding stoner sexuality. Email her at hya@hightimes.com.
Last Week’s Stoner Sex: Makeup Passion, That Time of the Month, Pregnancy & Weed-Crazy Partners
from
http://hightimes.com/culture/stoner-sex-high-for-the-holidaze-all-kinds-of-stress/
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